Revealed! the secrets of avoiding sexual temptation!

God commands and demands that there shouldn't even be a hint of sexual immorality among us as His saved people (Ephesians 5:3). Of course, we all find this incredibly easy to do, right? WRONG!
This feels completely impossible most (maybe all) of the time. If there is one area of life where it feels like Satan is winning the battle, it’s in the area of sex. And if there is one area where our bodies are screaming out to us to disobey God, it’s in the area of sex.
So I want to give you my top 20 tips to help you avoid sexual immorality:

1. Find out what pleases the Lord. This is a command straight out of Ephesians 5:10, and is part of what it means to live a life worthy of our calling as Christians, and part of what it means to live a life of love, just as Christ loved us.
2. Find out what God’s will for your life is. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 says, “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God;” It doesn’t get much clearer than that!
3. The battle begins in the mind. You need to know what God says about sex and trust what God says about sex. You need to be careful what you fill your minds with. Imagination is often the hot-bed where sin is hatched. Martin Luther once said about sexual desires, “You can’t stop birds from flying over your head, but you can stop them from making nests in your hair.”
4. Pray (It is a spiritual battle too). Depend on God, on the power of His Holy Spirit to strengthen you in this battle. (Matthew 6:13; 2 Timothy 2:22; James 5:16)
5. Don't put yourself in situations where you will be easily tempted. There is little point praying that God would not lead you into temptation, then walking straight into a tempting situation.
6. Remember God is watching. You are never completely out of sight. Someone can always see you.
7. Wield the axe. Jesus says in Matthew 5, if your eye or hand causes you to sin, gouge them out and throw them away, because eternal life is at stake. So if the internet, magazines, TV, or peer groups are causing you to sin; wield the axe. Chop away those things that tempt you.
8. Talk about sex (accountability). You can't fight this alone. You need God's help and you need help from God's people too.
9. You are not alone. It can be helpful to know you are not the only person who has ever been tempted this way. “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man” (1 Corinthians 10:13a)
10. You CAN resist. "God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear" (1 Corinthians 10:13b).
11. Know that God provides a way out. "But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it" (1 Corinthians 10:13c).
12. Count yourself dead to sin and alive to God. Christians are people who have died to sin (knowing that sin leads to death), and now live for God and righteousness, knowing that this leads to eternal life (Romans 6:11-14).
13. Remember the cross. Jesus died for our sins, including our sexual sins.
14. Remember Jesus is coming back. We will all have to give an account for our lives, even our sex life.
15. Memorise Scripture. When Jesus was tempted in the desert, he fired Scripture back at the devil (Matthew 4:1-11). Having God’s Word in the forefront of your mind can help you too.
16. Weariness and sadness often leads to sin. Learn to know yourself. Know when you are weak and susceptible to temptation.
17. Struggling is a good sign. Keep fighting and don't give in.
18. Be careful what you wear. Modesty is good for you and good for others too.
19. Forgiveness is available. If you sin sexually you can still be forgiven, such is the power of the cross of Christ. So repent, turn back to God and live for Him.
20. Read some good books. Fervr recently released Teen Sex By the Book. You might find it a helpful guide for answering some of your questions about sex.

I hope and pray that these tips will help you in this fight. Remember, 'not even a hint of sexual immorality', is God's loving standard for you (Ephesians 5:3)

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Are Homosexuals going to hell?

It’s increasingly one of the most hotly debated issues in our society, both inside and outside the church: Should countries like Australia change their marriage laws to allow homosexual couples to marry? It’s a question that raises many other questions about sex and marriage. It’s a question you might be asked by your family or friends or workmates, some of whom will have strong views on this issue. It may be a question that you or those you know find deeply personal. For these and many other reasons, Christians should be prepared to give an answer.
What does the Bible teach about homosexuality and marriage and does this apply today?

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Help im single!

 

Making the most of your time as a single person.

Different gifts for different people

Now I want to start by acknowledging that I just got married. So in one sense, it seems funny for me to write an article about singleness. But I have been single before, even though I may not have wrestled with this issue (in a personal sense) as much as others have. But let’s have a look at how the Bible describes singleness - you might be surprised.
In 1 Corinthians 7, the Apostle Paul spends a good deal of time answering questions the Corinthian church had about marriage and singleness. Here is what he says in verses 7-9:

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And so what if my partner is an unbeliever?

 

Christians are called to be radically different to the rest of the world.

Christians are called to be different

You may not be old enough to be thinking seriously about marriage just yet, but you might be thinking about dating. The advice below applies equally to daters, as to those thinking of getting married.
The Bible teaches us that as Christians, we have freedom in Christ (Galatians 5:1). This freedom, that Jesus so dearly bought for us, is freedom from slavery to sin and death. We are now free to live as God in his infinite wisdom, intends. So what kind of life are we to live?

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Are you insane? No sex before marriage?

In case you’re wondering why Christians stick with the idea of no sex before marriage, here are some reasons.
Firstly, the Bible teaches it. Check out Romans 13:9, 1 Corinthians 6:13, 1 Corinthians 6:18  Galatians 5:19, Ephesians 5:3, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 for just a few references!

Taking the long-term view

If you wait until marriage, you can know that the person likes you for who you are, and not because you’ll go all the way. If you wait, you can have a good confidence that both you and your partner should be able to resist having affairs if you have been able to resist hopping into bed with each other! If you wait, you can focus on communication skills which will stand your marriage in good stead for the future.
Research shows that marriages that start out as live-together have a higher divorce rate than those that do not.

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And so what if i watch pornography?

 

It's bigger than lust, and more than just disobeying the Bible.

Pornography - a big issue

When it comes to thinking about how to live as a Christian, pornography is one of the most talked about topics that comes up. And you can guarantee that when you hear pornography being talked about in Christian circles, we're told that it's bad because:

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Sexting - why it’s a bad idea

 

Texting sexy pics is a sign of a deeper problem

Sexting has been in the news a lot lately. Australia's first ''sexting'' case is before the Law Courts at the moment. Damien Eades has been charged with possession of child pornography because a 13 year-old girl sent naked photos of herself to his phone. And there is a new government ad campaign warning young people about the dangers of sexting (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwKgg35YbC4).

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How should I date?

Whenever I hear my non-christian friends and family talk about dating or 'playing the field', and whenever I hear about dating in a movie or in a magazine,  it always seems to include sleeping around. The theory seems to be, in order to find the right long-term partner, you should date as many people as possible, and 'try out' all the aspects of a long-term relationship.. ie. including sex.

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Is being gay a sin?

Same sex attraction is when you have sexual feelings for people of the same sex as you. It's a massive issue in our society at the moment. And in the last few months I've spoken to a heap of young people at my church about same sex attraction.
A few weeks ago Dave* told me he has always been attracted to other boys, and if it comes to choosing between Jesus and expressing himself sexually, he might not choose Jesus.
More recently, Daniel* told me how he used to really struggle with his same sex attraction and felt that nobody accepted or loved him. He's said he prayed for many years and now

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11 Tips to help you avoid sexual immorality

God commands and demands that there shouldn't even be a hint of sexual immorality among us as his saved people (Ephesians 5:3). Which, of course, we all find incredibly easy to do, right? WRONG! This feels completely impossible most (maybe all) of the time. If there is one area of life where it feels like Satan is winning the battle, its in the area of sex. And if there is one area where our bodies are screaming out for us to disobey God, its in the area of sex. So I want to give you my top 11 tips to help you avoid sexual immorality.

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Is it really wrong to have sex before marriage?

The short answer is that Christians believe it is wrong to have sex before marriage, based on what the Bible says about both sex and marriage.

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Love vs. Lust: How to know the difference?

So… you see a girl (or boy… if you’re a girl) walking across the playground at school. They glance over your direction, only to see you staring right at them with a stunned look on your face! You quickly pretend that you are looking at something else! You start to sweat a little… you try to play it cool, but on the inside your guts do a triple somersault, with a half twist

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4 reasons why you shouldn't start too early...

Michael Dicker • December 13, 2010 37 1

17

Non-christian culture has a saying (a proverb) for dating. You might have heard the saying "play the field before you settle down". I still hear this proverb being used everywhere from TV shows to magazines, and I think it's true to say that our culture still views dating as a means to find a more permanent and stable relationship. This is true in the Christian view of dating too.

So if this is the case, when should I date?

This will probably upset a few people, but my hot tip is that you shouldn't start dating until you've at least left high school, and I have 4 reasons for taking this line...

1) To avoid extra temptation.

Entering into a relationship with the opposite sex is going to provide more temptation for sexual sin because there are more opportunities for it. Let's not kid ourselves... if you don't have that one-on-one exclusive dating relationship with the opposite sex, the chances are you're not really going to have any opportunity to be tempted into sexual activity with another person. It may happen... but unlikely. Eros love (sexual love) can be a dangerous thing, so why open yourself up to more temptation? 3 times in the book Song of Songs the beloved woman warns the young women "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." (Song of Songs 2:7, 3:5, 8:4).

2) Because break-ups are messy.

It's awkward when 2 people - who are part of a larger group of relationships like youth group - decide to break up. It's awkward because break-ups don't just affect the 2 people involved, but the whole community. It can breed a whole range of unhelpful feelings like resentment, jealousy, envy, and loneliness. I've seen what teen break-ups have done in youth groups and the destruction it causes when some stop coming to youth group because they can't handle being around their ex, or friends are forced to choose sides. Not to mention the heart ache of being rejected or dumped. Relationships are already pretty fragile around the teenage years, so why put them in jeopardy by risking a destructive break-up? You will still risk the hurt of break-ups when you're an adult, but hopefully by then your faith in Christ will have matured and strengthened, and you will have formed a strong and stable friendship base to get you through.

3) Because people change.

During your adolescent years at high school you are undergoing some massive changes physically and mentally, and the values that you have in your high school years may change dramatically once you finish school and start Uni or join the work force. People change throughout their lifetime in all sorts of ways, but the changes that happen in transition from adolescence to adulthood are probably the most dramatic. There's a massive chance that the person you liked in high school will not be the same person you'll like as an adult. Having said that, I do know a Christian couple who starting going out when they were 14 and are now still happily married in the 50's.

4) It's fun being young and single.

You've got the rest of your life to be married (and marriage is good!) but you are only young once and you should enjoy the time you have to be young and single. Marriage is good and wonderful, but there is more freedom during your years as a single person. As Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:32-34 "An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband."

What do you think? Leave your comments below.

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Christian girls in a sexy world

 Some people may judge you on looks & clothes, but God cares about your heart.

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Waiting for "Mr or Mrs" Right abi?

Is there a perfect partner out there for you? How will you know who it is?

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So you think you can date?

Answering some of the big questions about sex, purity, and dating

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Dealing with 'Haters'

But, you know what? Despite what people may say about you behind your back or how they may treat you, your worth and identity are never in question because He who defines you never changes His mind about you. In fact, His thoughts about you outnumber the grains of sand! (Psalm 139:17).

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Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship

 

How should Christians act when they're dating?
Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship tries to crack an old chestnut: how do two people who love Jesus go from being strangers to lovers without compromise?
The problem with most books, sermons and advice on relationships is that we all tend to take our own experiences and use them to make rules for other people. But each relationship is as different

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Campus Relationships: where do they end sef? Part two

Relationship Mythbusters:

Start as you intend to continue

Are you a Christian? Do you want to follow Jesus in your life? Following Jesus is a whole lot easier when you marry someone who is just as keen to follow him as you are. If you’re getting into relationships with people who aren’t Christians, you’re probably going to keep on getting into relationships with people who aren’t Christians. There’s no sudden point where you think, “Ah, now this is where I start having serious relationships, so I will now change my mind about who I want

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Campus Relationships: where do they end sef ? Part One.

Relationship Mythbusters

Where all relationships end up...

It might have started in primary school: you sent each other notes, and called each other “girlfriend” and “boyfriend” (even if you hardly talked). You laughed about it and got totally embarrassed, but it felt good to have a special someone. Then you hit high school. His voice broke, her body changed. Suddenly girls didn’t have germs anymore, and boys stopped being quite so annoying. Suddenly, they were hot.
But being an adult seems so far away. It’s years until you leave school, so you’ve got ages before you need to think about anything like marriage. I mean, that’s something that old people do, isn’t it?
Let’s get real. On the one hand, your body is telling you it is totally ready to hit the relationship market, or at least to experiment a little. On the other hand, the land of serious relationships feels like it is a loooong way away.
You probably don’t want to know, but there are only two possible results of a relationship:

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